Urge surfing: ride out an alcohol craving without giving in

A craving feels like an order: drink now. In practice it is a sensation that builds, peaks and fades, usually within minutes rather than hours. Urge surfing is a mindfulness technique, developed from the relapse-prevention work of psychologist G. Alan Marlatt, that teaches you to watch that wave instead of obeying it.

Why it works

Fighting a craving tends to feed it, because your attention stays locked on the thing you are trying not to think about. Observing it with curiosity changes your relationship to it. You learn from your own experience that a craving is temporary and that you can feel it without acting on it. Each time you do, the next one has a little less power.

How to surf an urge in five steps

1. Notice it. Say to yourself, "This is a craving." Naming it creates a small gap between you and the urge.
2. Find it in your body. Is it in your throat, chest, stomach or hands? Rate how strong it is from 0 to 10.
3. Breathe slowly into that spot. A longer exhale than inhale, for example in for 4 and out for 6, helps your body settle.
4. Watch it change. Cravings rarely stay at the same intensity. Check your rating every minute or so and notice whether it rises, plateaus or dips.
5. Let it pass. When it fades, note how long it lasted and what you did. That is evidence you can use next time.

Tips for the first few tries

• Practise when a craving is mild so the skill is ready for a strong one.
• Keep a timer. Seeing that the peak lasted 12 minutes, not forever, is powerful.
• Pair it with a change of scene: step outside, drink a glass of water, or put on music.
• Write down your trigger afterwards (stress, a place, a person, a time of day) to spot patterns.

Sober Ally's Craving SOS includes guided breathing and a craving timer, free on the home screen, so the steps above are one tap away when an urge hits.